• pigduck
• Oct 18,2007
• In: Family, Spiritual Affairs

In Loving Memory - My Eulogy

Here is my eulogy that I read at my father’s wake:- 

Papa loved it when Merdeka day was near. He would tell everybody that his birthday was on August 31 and that the government had given everyone a day off because of him.

Papa had many friends who loved him because he was happy and nice to be around. His favourite hobby was playing golf with his buddies. He was an avid golfer right up until he was unable to play. I think Che che and I bought him almost all the golf merchandise available as presents – from shirts to putting mats to those gadgets to dig out soil from the shoes.

Papa enjoyed the simple pleasures of life – he really liked to play spider solitaire, for one. He played it for the last 6 years everyday if he could, and continuously for hours at a time too. He was so hooked we had to pry his fingers from the mouse most of the time. Right up to his last day in KL, he played it. He told me it calmed and de-stressed him.

When he played bubble shooter, he would call me over from the other end of the house proudly pointing out with a twinkle in his eye, his high score or to show me his last shot. Che che had trumped him once and he told me he was going to beat her score by double and he did 3 months ago. He was physically weak then but his mind was still quick and alert.

Papa and Mama used to snack every night on all sorts of things in front of the tv. It was their little routine. Watching tv with him was strange because he’d be engrossed in the program but there’d be no sound.

Another simple pleasure? Eating - Papa loved to eat – Indian rojak, ais kacang, bak kut t’eh, chu yoke fun, potong potong – you guys might know some others - and there were times, he’d sneak out with Carmen to eat lok lok. When he went to buy food he’d buy a lot to “share” he said. He loved Japanese food too and would always order the bento set so we could all share the food with him. He loved sharing and giving.

Papa gave us the best without asking for anything in return. He was protective yet gave us space. He expanded the house so we could all have our own private bathrooms and rooms. He respected and believed in us and always supported and assured us in everything we did. He handled everything from our passports to our ICs to household matters to our logistics. We hardly, if ever, had to worry.

Papa would never raise his voice at us but would instead joke and speak childishly. He made us feel precious and young. When we were sad, he would comfort us… “neme-mine, it’s ok…it’s ok…nothing what… why are you crying?… go wash your face and come back…”

And the last two years, the tables turned and we had to be there for Papa just like how he had been for us. We worried for him, we comforted him. We got to hug and kiss him more, hold his hand, care for him and appreciate the time with him. We tried to return the love, care and devotion that Papa had shown us over the years.

Even more special was how I learned so much of God through Papa. God is more real than we think He is and that is the greatest gift Papa could have given to us. God was with us every step of the way surrounding us with hope, love and strength. He provided answers to prayers and faith that moved mountains.

Papa always lived his life to the full without regrets. We too should enjoy, love, celebrate and give like he did. That would be what Papa wanted.