• pigduck
• Oct 23,2007
• In: Family, Spiritual Affairs

In Loving Memory - Tan Clan Cousins’ Eulogy

Here is the eulogy from the Tan Clan Cousins’ (Michael as rep) that was read out at my father’s wake:-

Intro
Dear Friends, Good evening. My name is Michael, a nephew of Uncle Pok Suan.  We are deeply touched and we appreciate your presence here tonight to pay respects to my uncle Pok Suan. Standing here today on behalf of all my cousins, I would like to share our experiences with our uncle with you.

As an Uncle
I remembered vividly when we were very young, Uncle Pok Suan was an Uncle who would bring us out for picnics and swimming almost every weekend in his shiny Honda Prelude. He always looked after us and sent us home personally to make sure we have enjoyed the day.

Moving on, after he returned from Canada, our family managed to live together in this apartment. We got the privilege to spend more time with each other. We would usually see him here most evenings loitering around the car park making sure everything was well taken care of, which earned him the name “Mr. Fix It”. But all of us knew that his normal evening stroll in the car park was because he could not smoke at home. His strong loud voice would always scare everyone but never has he raised his voice at us.  His behavior sometimes reminded us of our Ah Kong (grandpa) while his smiles bring back memories of our Ah Poh (grandma).

As we grew older, we got to know him better with his witty remarks, jokes and his occasional teasing. He would always want to know more about us individually and would chat with asking us about our lives, our hobbies and our daily life occurrence. All of us saw a different side of him, no more the fierce uncle that we have known from young, but a caring and lovable uncle. Some would also call him cute with his antics and his sometimes peculiar behavior!! One of the memorable antics would be him singing the song “Tell Laura, I love her, Tell Laura I need her,” but he would replace the word Laura with our Aunty Jean during karaoke.

On most occasions where we have our family gatherings by the poolside, he will always be our first target to be thrown into the pool. He is always our “Sporting Uncle”. We will always remember how he hung on strongly to the pillar while we cleared his pockets of all valuables.  Upon getting out from the pool, he will then help us capture the other victims.

Every Chinese New Year, it is customary that we would meet at his house on most nights until Chap Goh Mei for a friendly black jack session. Every year without fail, Aunty Jean would be the dealer and Uncle Pok Suan would always playfully try to help us win money from his wife. The session is always good not because of the gaming session but our interaction around his dining table. Our favorite quotes from these sessions were when Aunty Jean goes “Pok ah Pok dim ah?” (Pok, ah Pok, how?!) when Aunty Jean’s card were not good or “Pok ah Pok mou chin chor la” (Pok ah Pok, no more money la!) and Uncle Pok Suan would dutifully top up Aunty Jean’s coffers. Among his generosity towards the niece and nephews, his endless supply of fireworks during Chinese New Year will be greatly missed.

He would always joke about him giving us a holiday on his birthday every year. But the truth is, Merdeka Day is always a public holiday. This year, the cousins planned a surprise visit to Singapore to celebrate his birthday. He was happy to see us and even managed to sit up and chat with us although he was in great pain as a result of an infection two nights back. It was nice seeing our uncle laughing and talking with us without a thought of him being unwell.

As a Mentor
I had the luxury to work with this great and caring uncle who was my boss for the last 8 years. He was a strict boss and always made sure that I learned from the basics and that I learned it well. As far back as I could remember, when I was young, Uncle Pok Suan had a reputation of being fierce in the office but over time however, I found this reputation misplaced, as he always wanted us to give our best effort in our work and that was his way of showing his encouragement and guidance and to make sure matters of the office was going well.

As a boss, he did not show any favoritism and that as an employee I had to gain his trust and respect. I enjoyed working with him and that his presence in the office was greatly missed  over these last 2 years. Like any gathering at home, his presence and his enthusiasm in the office always made the place livelier.  

By working with him, he has become less of an Uncle, but more of a mentor and friend. Whenever friends come for a visit at the office, he would always be in the mood to tell stories and jokes. I never grew tired of listening to his stories of his work achievements and experiences.

Uncle Pok Suan also imparted the game of golf to both me and my other cousin, Jackson. His love for the game can be seen from his dedication in teaching us how to play in KLGCC occasionally. There was a time when Jackson and I were at the driving range by ourselves one night practicing our swing, my phone rang, and as soon as I picked up, and before I can say anything, his familiar loud voice went “Stand up straight, you are not standing straight enough, how to swing like that” and I was like looking around more amazed than shock. He just went “I can see you, no need to look for me” and kept giving me the instructions over and over again over the phone. Remembering this particular incident always makes me laugh. But that was Uncle Pok Suan, always watching over us as he is now from Heaven.    
 
The last couple of months, it was very sad and painful to see our Uncle Pok Suan transferring from one hospital to another and the constant need for blood and platelet transfusions. We are glad that we got to spend more time with him and that he got to spend more time with his family though we wished it was under different circumstances. I was also glad that Uncle Pok Suan got to laugh and joke with his friends during his last trip back to KL. It was nice to know that under all those pain he was able to laugh and be cheerful.

I can remember of our recent conversation together, he spoke about God often. He was very calm and his thoughts were well collected. We are happy that he is with the Lord now, and one day see each other again. Until then, we will always miss him dearly. Thank you.