2 weeks ago, I picked out a book to read called, “My Best Friend’s Girl“. It’s about a girl who takes legal guardianship of her best friend’s daughter after her best friend dies.

Now, I didn’t know that this book had someone dying of leukaemia. All I knew from reading the back cover was that this girl’s best friend was dying. I remember reading the book and bawling when the best friend dies. It was just so sad I couldn’t help myself. I burst into tears, sobbing and pining. All this in the middle of the night.

It came at a time just before the memorial service and it was good I had a moment to reconnect with all those emotions.

Today marks the 6th month that my dad is no longer with us. 6 months. Time has stood still and flown by.

Yesterday, I previewed a snippet of Mariah Carey’s new song, “Bye Bye” from E=MC2. When it started, I was a bit skeptical but when it came to the bridge/ending, I was suddenly moved to tears. Literally. It was a rush of emotions. The song is “for those who have lost a loved one.” When I first heard of this track a few months back, I thought Mariah would write a very personal track about losing her father but I didn’t imagine it would be as anthemic or as universal as this. What made this snippet so amazing was the emotion that just flowed through her voice. I hadn’t seen the video preview yet at the time, just heard the sound snippet and I choked. When I went back to listen to it later, I still felt that choking feeling and not only that, it is the harmonies and the melody that really moves me. I cannot wait to hear the whole track in its entirety.

I was also given the privilege to preview, “Feast of Love” yesterday and somehow, when I do preview movies, the themes always involve death, loss, grief and love. This was no exception.

The movies I previewed previously were “The Pursuit of Happyness“, “Charlotte’s Web” and “Catch and Release“.

So I was feeling a bit melancholic yesterday.

I some times worry that there might come a time where I will forget Papa and the memories I have of him will fade. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you, Papa. Missing you. Thank you.